Second-guessing shows up after you’ve already found something worth following. I’ve been thinking about that in the context of my last post on “weak ties.” The whole idea there was simple. It’s that the next opportunity usually doesn’t come from the people you talk to every day, because there’s nothing new being introduced in those conversations. They’re strong, they’re grounding, they reinforce what you already know and what you’re already good at. But when something shifts in your career, in your industry, in what you’re offering then those same conversations don’t tend to move you forward. The new input, the thing that actually opens up a different path, usually comes from somewhere just outside of that circle. And when it does, it doesn’t arrive as a fully formed opportunity. It shows up as something a little harder to place. A conversation that’s interesting but not clearly useful. A direction that doesn’t quite connect yet. There’s usually a moment where you feel a bit of curiosity… and then almost immediately, you start questioning it.
That second part is the piece I’m starting to notice more. The instinct to step back, to make it make sense before giving it any real energy. It doesn’t feel like shutting something down at the time. It feels like being rational. Like staying focused. But more often than not, that’s the exact moment where something new is trying to take shape, and it just hasn’t had the time or space to do it yet. The things that actually lead somewhere rarely feel clear at the beginning. They feel slightly off-pattern, a little uncomfortable, harder to explain. And because of that, they’re easy to dismiss. Not because they’re wrong, but because they don’t match anything you already understand.
So the challenge, at least for me right now, isn’t necessarily to go out and find more of those moments. They seem to show up on their own once you start opening things up a bit and connect with your Weak Ties. The harder part is staying with them just a little longer than feels natural. Not needing them to make sense right away, or connect perfectly to where you’ve been, but giving them enough space to see what might actually be there. Because the risk isn’t that nothing new will show up. It’s that something will… and I’ll talk myself out of it before it has a chance to become anything.